Canon in "Retcon" Major
Just a collection of songs inspired by the colossal mishandling of the Halo universe at the hands of Bungie Studios.
Story Ain't Deep
Dire Straits - Money for Nothin'
Vocals: Cody Miller
I want a, I want a, I want a good story
Look at Halo 1 yeah, that's the way you do it
You write a game with a good story
Reach Ain't working, that's not the way you do it
There's lots of action but the story ain't deep
Reach ain't working, that's not the way you do it
Now lemme tell ya, a good rule of thumb
Maybe make your characters do shit that matters
The damage done can't be undone
We gotta turn on coms array buttons
And hit a few brutes with stickies
We got to move these few civilians
But this don't advance the story
That little fanboy with the custom reach xbox
Yeah buddy, are you aware?
That little fanboy tries to 'scuse the retcons
That little fanboy just doesn't care
We gotta turn on coms array buttons
And hit a few brutes with stickies
We got to move these few civilians
But this don't advance the story
retcon retcon
Uh
We gotta turn on coms array buttons
And hit a few brutes with stickies
We got to move these few civilians
But this don't advance the story
They should a learned to write good characters
They should a learned proper plot structure
Look at that mama, there is no second plot point
Man, Hp concurs
And he's up there? What's that? Hawaiian Pig?
Beating on that Horse with a post or three
Oh that's ain't working, that's not the way you do it
All you'll do there is piss off GV
We gotta turn on coms array buttons
And hit a few brutes with stickies
We got to move these few civilians
But this don't advance the story
Look at Halo 1 yeah, that's the way you do it
You write a game with a good story
Reach Ain't working, that's not the way you do it
There's lots of action but the story ain't deep
There's lots of action but the story ain't deep
There's lots of action but the story ain't deep
Lots of action, story ain't deep
look at that, look at that
There's lots of action but the story ain't deep
I want a, I want a, I want a good story
I want a, I want a, I want a good story
I want a, I want a, I want a good story
I want a, I want a, I want a good story
Smells Like Retcon
Nirvana - Smells Like Teen Spirit
Vocals: Cody Miller
Load up your gun, falcons descend
My disbelief, I can't suspend
The covenant, came in unheard
And no-one saw, now that's absurd
halo, Halo, Halo, Halo
Halo, halo, Halo, halo
Halo, Halo, Halo, Halo
Halo, Halo, Halo, halo
Now that it's out, story's heinous!
All the retcons, they enrage us!
Our accusations, they aren't baseless!
All these retcons, they're just laziness!
Writing's not, what they do best
The dialogue, leaves me distressed
Fall of Reach, we disavow
Cause Bungie's games are canon now
halo, Halo, Halo, Halo
Halo, halo, Halo, halo
Halo, Halo, Halo, Halo
Halo, Halo, Halo, halo
Now that it's out, story's heinous!
All the retcons, they enrage us!
Our accusations, they aren't baseless!
All these retcons, they're just laziness!
I wish I had, some liquid bleach
To erase what came in Reach
Just what was on Bungie's mind?
It breaks canon? Oh nevermind...
halo, Halo, Halo, Halo
Halo, halo, Halo, halo
Halo, Halo, Halo, Halo
Halo, Halo, Halo, halo
Now that it's out, story's heinous!
All the retcons, they enrage us!
Our accusations, they aren't baseless!
All these retcons, they're just laziness!
Reachfly
Firefly Theme
Vocals: Shaun Hashim
Guitar: Shaun Hashim
Take my Pillar of Autumn and,
Take it where it cannot land.
I don't care, since Halo 3,
You can't take the canon from me.
Split Cortana right in two,
Just to make it work for you.
Jorge said Mom to Halsey,
You can't take the canon from me.
The Spartan IIIs can suck on these!
Oh yeah! There's no plot that I can see!
Got new respect for ODST,
and their voice actors of Serenity.
The Fall of Reach is dear to me,
and it was wrecked by Bungie.
And you can't take the canon from me...
DISCLAIMER: No copyrighted material has been used. All background music has been reproduced as instrumental covers.